Confessions of a Housewife

This morning the males in my home decided to go meet with other males to shoot at each other with paintballs.  They find this incredibly amusing, and I find it liberating for them to be out of my hair when I need to clean the house.

Because I woke up with the "official" cleaning uniform of all housewives...(my husband's old softball shirt, a pair of fleece pajama pants and a ponytail) I decided to give my house a real good scrubbing.  The kind of cleaning that nobody except for me and Jesus would notice.  Do you know what I mean?

I took the kickboard off of the front of the refrigerator and found out that there is a whole scary universe living under there that makes me shudder in terror.  An old matchbox car, a green crayon, a baby spoon and enough dust bunnies to make Barbie a fur coat were all lurking in the darkness.  Cleaning under the fridge is not for the faint of heart!

Later on I gave the living room a thorough cleaning from top to bottom.  As I was vacuuming up tiny Nerd candies from under the couch cushions, I suddenly had the overwhelming urge to eat one!  I actually picked one up and put it to my lips and then it hit me like a lightening bolt...."WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING?"  I was totally disturbed, and temporarily out my mind! To think that I almost ate a piece of candy from under the couch cushion was just too much to bear because:

A. I wasn't even hungry. 

B. I don't even really like grape Nerds.

I had to ask myself, "What does this all mean?"

"If I'm not starving, and I don't like grape Nerds, then what on God's green earth possessed me to dig one out of the couch and almost eat it?"

"More importantly, what would I be willing to eat if I was starving?"

"Is this what happens when you're in the trenches of motherhood?"

I don't have any answers, but I know that my actions reminded me of the time my son ate an old french fry out of his car seat.  He was two.  I am not.  Now I am even more confused.

Feeling Perplexed in Pajama Pants,

Nell