Saturday, November 20, 2010

Confessions of a Housewife

This morning the males in my home decided to go meet with other males to shoot at each other with paintballs.  They find this incredibly amusing, and I find it liberating for them to be out of my hair when I need to clean the house.

Because I woke up with the "official" cleaning uniform of all housewives...(my husband's old softball shirt, a pair of fleece pajama pants and a ponytail) I decided to give my house a real good scrubbing.  The kind of cleaning that nobody except for me and Jesus would notice.  Do you know what I mean?

I took the kickboard off of the front of the refrigerator and found out that there is a whole scary universe living under there that makes me shudder in terror.  An old matchbox car, a green crayon, a baby spoon and enough dust bunnies to make Barbie a fur coat were all lurking in the darkness.  Cleaning under the fridge is not for the faint of heart!

Later on I gave the living room a thorough cleaning from top to bottom.  As I was vacuuming up tiny Nerd candies from under the couch cushions, I suddenly had the overwhelming urge to eat one!  I actually picked one up and put it to my lips and then it hit me like a lightening bolt...."WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING?"  I was totally disturbed, and temporarily out my mind! To think that I almost ate a piece of candy from under the couch cushion was just too much to bear because:

A. I wasn't even hungry. 

B. I don't even really like grape Nerds.

I had to ask myself, "What does this all mean?"

"If I'm not starving, and I don't like grape Nerds, then what on God's green earth possessed me to dig one out of the couch and almost eat it?"

"More importantly, what would I be willing to eat if I was starving?"

"Is this what happens when you're in the trenches of motherhood?"

I don't have any answers, but I know that my actions reminded me of the time my son ate an old french fry out of his car seat.  He was two.  I am not.  Now I am even more confused.

Feeling Perplexed in Pajama Pants,


1 comment:

  1. I tried a few days ago to comment from my iPhone but realized it didn't work...anyway, I am SO glad you found my blog so that I could find your's!!! yay!!! LOVE that we have so much in common....I'm puttin' you on my Reader list RIGHT NOW! Happy Thanksgiving!!! Do you mind me asking where y'all live??? What state?